I had surgery yesterday. Arthroscopy for a torn meniscus. It's affected me more than I thought it would. More pain, and then I threw up this morning, I guess from the Vicodin. The orthopaedist called me a bit ago, though, and is giving me another prescription, plus one for nausea, so as soon as I can get my son back here to pick it up for me, I'll be just ducky. The doc said that my knee showed more wear and tear than he had expected, and he shaved quite a bit off, behind my patella. That may be part of why it hurts so much. Oh well, I'm glad I had it done.
One of the good things to come out of this is the love and care that has been shown to me by loved ones. One dear one tried to work it out to fly here to care for me (and drink a few margaritas, I suspect!), another came by here at 6 to take me to the hospital and then picked me up again after. My sons spent hours sitting there for me, and they've been absolutely wonderful about doing things for me, running errands, helping me clean up after I puked. True love, I'll tell you. It's a beautiful thing.
Wednesday, December 20, 2006
Thursday, December 14, 2006
And so it resumes.
So much happening. Has been. Will be. Hopefully this will be the beginning of regular writing, again. I pretty much stopped the writing for two reasons. First, I was so overwhelmed with things going on that I had no time nor energy to spare to do so. Secondly, I probably would have felt the urge to rhapsodize about my sweetie, and that didn't seem a wise course of action in a beginning relationship. 'Hi, hon! Check out my blog! I love you. You love me. Now I'm going to analyze things in public. :smooch:'
Now, I've taken care of a lot of things that were weighing on me. I have a couple more things to do, but I'm feeling good about getting them done in the next couple of weeks. Regarding my second reason for avoiding opening up my thoughts, well....things are good. Beautiful, even. The things that were worrying me in the first few months aren't an issue any more, so I have no need to spill my guts about it. Therefore, it's safe to go back into the water again.
Now, I've taken care of a lot of things that were weighing on me. I have a couple more things to do, but I'm feeling good about getting them done in the next couple of weeks. Regarding my second reason for avoiding opening up my thoughts, well....things are good. Beautiful, even. The things that were worrying me in the first few months aren't an issue any more, so I have no need to spill my guts about it. Therefore, it's safe to go back into the water again.
Wednesday, September 27, 2006
Monday, September 04, 2006
The Life I Want to Live
Sorting through some of the boxes from my move, deciding what to throw out, what to give away and what to keep, I ran across a list I made two years ago, entitled 'The Life I Want to Live.'
- Examined
- Compassionate
- Clear
- Connected
- Spiritual
- Healthy
- Disciplined
- Fun
- Surprising
- Interesting
- Honest
- Appreciated
Two years later, I'd say that those characteristics still cover it. :)
Saturday, August 26, 2006
Two in One Morning!
Some Food for Thought
I got this meme from Anica’s blog:
How do you like your eggs? Soft-boiled, with a very runny middle, spread out over a buttered piece of toast. (No, I don’t do it in public.)
How do you take your coffee/tea? Black and strong. I like lattes, but prefer the straight ones….espresso, no flavors. Tea, straight or with sugar.
Favorite breakfast food? A toasted bagel with cream cheese. And extra pulpy orange juice.
Peanut butter- Smooth or crunchy? Extra Crunchy.
What kind of dressing on your salad? Bleu Cheese.
You’re feeling lazy. What do you make? Grilled cheese, preferably with sliced tomato in it.
You’re feeling really lazy. What kind of pizza do you order? Leo’s stuffed crust, with mushroom and onion.
You feel like cooking. What do you make? I can’t pick any one thing. I like so many.
Do any foods bring back good memories? Turkish brings back the most wonderful, along with garlic mashed potatoes. And octopus.
Do any foods bring back bad memories? Probably.
Do any foods remind you of someone? Yes. Turkish, garlic mashed potatoes and octopus……. The Leo's pizza reminds me of my sons.
Is there a food you refuse to eat? Kidneys. I'll give haggis one more try. Maybe.
What was your favorite food as a child? My mom made the most wonderful fish in a white sauce, flavored with white wine, over rice. I still salivate at the thought of it.
Is there a food that you hated as a child but now love? Brussels sprouts.
Is there a food that you loved as a child but now hate? Nothing that stands out.
Favorite fruit & vegetable? Fresh ripe peaches and asparagus, I guess.
Favorite junk food? Hard to choose, I like so much. Cap’n Crunch. Twinkies. Snickers. Ben & Jerry’s Pistachio Pistachio. Pringles….. You see my dilemma.
Favorite between meal snack? To be healthy, I’ll forego the previous answers and say string cheese. It’s a life-saver.
Do you have any weird food habits? Hmmmm…..I can’t think of any.
You’re on a diet. What food(s) do you fill up on? Grape tomatoes. String cheese. Fruit.
You’re off your diet. Now what would you like? Good bread. With Nutella. And a hot fudge sundae, with vanilla ice cream, bananas, almonds and whipped cream. And a rare steak, with garlic mashed potatoes. And lamb chops.
How spicy do you order Indian/Thai? Mild to medium.
Can I get you a drink? Freshly-squeezed orange juice with peach schnapps, please. My very favorite, though, if I can only pick one, is a plain margarita, on the rocks, with lots of salt.
Red wine or white? Yes.
Favorite dessert? Lots of them.
The perfect nightcap? A kiss.
I got this meme from Anica’s blog:
How do you like your eggs? Soft-boiled, with a very runny middle, spread out over a buttered piece of toast. (No, I don’t do it in public.)
How do you take your coffee/tea? Black and strong. I like lattes, but prefer the straight ones….espresso, no flavors. Tea, straight or with sugar.
Favorite breakfast food? A toasted bagel with cream cheese. And extra pulpy orange juice.
Peanut butter- Smooth or crunchy? Extra Crunchy.
What kind of dressing on your salad? Bleu Cheese.
You’re feeling lazy. What do you make? Grilled cheese, preferably with sliced tomato in it.
You’re feeling really lazy. What kind of pizza do you order? Leo’s stuffed crust, with mushroom and onion.
You feel like cooking. What do you make? I can’t pick any one thing. I like so many.
Do any foods bring back good memories? Turkish brings back the most wonderful, along with garlic mashed potatoes. And octopus.
Do any foods bring back bad memories? Probably.
Do any foods remind you of someone? Yes. Turkish, garlic mashed potatoes and octopus……. The Leo's pizza reminds me of my sons.
Is there a food you refuse to eat? Kidneys. I'll give haggis one more try. Maybe.
What was your favorite food as a child? My mom made the most wonderful fish in a white sauce, flavored with white wine, over rice. I still salivate at the thought of it.
Is there a food that you hated as a child but now love? Brussels sprouts.
Is there a food that you loved as a child but now hate? Nothing that stands out.
Favorite fruit & vegetable? Fresh ripe peaches and asparagus, I guess.
Favorite junk food? Hard to choose, I like so much. Cap’n Crunch. Twinkies. Snickers. Ben & Jerry’s Pistachio Pistachio. Pringles….. You see my dilemma.
Favorite between meal snack? To be healthy, I’ll forego the previous answers and say string cheese. It’s a life-saver.
Do you have any weird food habits? Hmmmm…..I can’t think of any.
You’re on a diet. What food(s) do you fill up on? Grape tomatoes. String cheese. Fruit.
You’re off your diet. Now what would you like? Good bread. With Nutella. And a hot fudge sundae, with vanilla ice cream, bananas, almonds and whipped cream. And a rare steak, with garlic mashed potatoes. And lamb chops.
How spicy do you order Indian/Thai? Mild to medium.
Can I get you a drink? Freshly-squeezed orange juice with peach schnapps, please. My very favorite, though, if I can only pick one, is a plain margarita, on the rocks, with lots of salt.
Red wine or white? Yes.
Favorite dessert? Lots of them.
The perfect nightcap? A kiss.
Protection
No, not what may have come to your mind at first (or is that only because I'm around teenagers so much?)
Over the last two years, I had gradually put on almost 25 pounds. The main reason, I believe, was to protect myself from the attention of those whose shallowness should lead them in other directions. I stopped my bike riding, I let go of my yoga, and I wasn't eating well. Yes, there was stress, etc., but by and large, it was to buffer myself.
I guess the need to do that has disappeared, because in the last three months I've lost fifteen pounds, mostly without trying. I haven't done it for anyone else, either. I feel so much better.
Over the last two years, I had gradually put on almost 25 pounds. The main reason, I believe, was to protect myself from the attention of those whose shallowness should lead them in other directions. I stopped my bike riding, I let go of my yoga, and I wasn't eating well. Yes, there was stress, etc., but by and large, it was to buffer myself.
I guess the need to do that has disappeared, because in the last three months I've lost fifteen pounds, mostly without trying. I haven't done it for anyone else, either. I feel so much better.
Friday, August 18, 2006
An Old Story....Updated
I began this entry with the intention of getting out my feelings of sadness over the moving of my youngest son to college. It would have been brilliant, no doubt, but luckily I got some RP love in the nick of time.
So, no moroseness. Maybe another time.
Peace.
So, no moroseness. Maybe another time.
Peace.
Thursday, August 17, 2006
Wuv. Twoo Wove.
Not much time, but I've been wanting to get back to this, so I'll start small.
I've been musing on love. True, unconditional love. Experiencing it, I've had to realize how mistrusting of men's ability to honestly experience it I'd become over the last three years. I was going to say, men's ability to sustain it, but isn't that the point of true love? The real, this-is-not-infatuation love. I suppose it's normal to project unease from previous relationships onto a later one, to some extent, but it's sure not fair for my sweetie to have to pay for the sins of lesser men, so I'll stop.
And thus leave myself wide open.
Imagine what it will be like to look back, twenty years later, smile and know that it truly has been real, finally.
Or is even saying this out loud a jinx?
*deep breath*
OK. Let go. You think this happens every day?
I've been musing on love. True, unconditional love. Experiencing it, I've had to realize how mistrusting of men's ability to honestly experience it I'd become over the last three years. I was going to say, men's ability to sustain it, but isn't that the point of true love? The real, this-is-not-infatuation love. I suppose it's normal to project unease from previous relationships onto a later one, to some extent, but it's sure not fair for my sweetie to have to pay for the sins of lesser men, so I'll stop.
And thus leave myself wide open.
Imagine what it will be like to look back, twenty years later, smile and know that it truly has been real, finally.
Or is even saying this out loud a jinx?
*deep breath*
OK. Let go. You think this happens every day?
Thursday, January 26, 2006
Four Things Meme
Four Things Meme
I’ve been tagged by Hotski, and added in a category from Ali’s. Nothin’ but the best, here!
Four jobs I have had in my life:
Microfiche maker
Extraneous materials tester in a candy factory
Teacher
Cafeteria line for a semester
Four movies I would watch over and over:
The Princess Bride
The Twilight Samurai
Can I count the entire Babylon 5 series as one?
The Lord of the Rings Trilogy
Four places I have lived:
The only Oblong (thank FSM)
Springfield, IL, home of the Simpsons and all things Lincoln
Delta House (not a sorority!)
Santa Monica
Four TV shows I love to watch:
I haven’t been watching much, but I guess I’d choose-
S-G1/Stargate/whatever it’s called
Battlestar Galactica
The Simpsons
The Daily Show
Four places I have been on vacation:
Morocco
The Adirondacks and Saratoga Springs and Manhattan (same trip)
Louisiana
Germany and Rome (ditto)
Four websites I visit daily :
Radio Paradise
My emails....well, some of them, usually....
Google images
Nancies.org (except for when I get behind, which is more than I’d like)
Four of my favorite foods:
fresh naan
Fresh pineapple
Anything made with someone I love
Kozy Shack chocolate pudding
Four places I would rather be right now:
1,060 miles away
yes
yeah
yep
(oh, ok- Pretty much anywhere in Europe, or in Costa Rica or Quebec. And 1,060 miles away.)
Four albums I can’t live without (at least for the moment):
The Garden State soundtrack
Fiona Apple’s Extraordinary Machine
Patty Griffin’s Impossible Dream
Cat Steven’s Greatest Hits
Four bloggers I am tagging:
Erinn
Jennnn
Melanie
Edie
I’ve been tagged by Hotski, and added in a category from Ali’s. Nothin’ but the best, here!
Four jobs I have had in my life:
Microfiche maker
Extraneous materials tester in a candy factory
Teacher
Cafeteria line for a semester
Four movies I would watch over and over:
The Princess Bride
The Twilight Samurai
Can I count the entire Babylon 5 series as one?
The Lord of the Rings Trilogy
Four places I have lived:
The only Oblong (thank FSM)
Springfield, IL, home of the Simpsons and all things Lincoln
Delta House (not a sorority!)
Santa Monica
Four TV shows I love to watch:
I haven’t been watching much, but I guess I’d choose-
S-G1/Stargate/whatever it’s called
Battlestar Galactica
The Simpsons
The Daily Show
Four places I have been on vacation:
Morocco
The Adirondacks and Saratoga Springs and Manhattan (same trip)
Louisiana
Germany and Rome (ditto)
Four websites I visit daily :
Radio Paradise
My emails....well, some of them, usually....
Google images
Nancies.org (except for when I get behind, which is more than I’d like)
Four of my favorite foods:
fresh naan
Fresh pineapple
Anything made with someone I love
Kozy Shack chocolate pudding
Four places I would rather be right now:
1,060 miles away
yes
yeah
yep
(oh, ok- Pretty much anywhere in Europe, or in Costa Rica or Quebec. And 1,060 miles away.)
Four albums I can’t live without (at least for the moment):
The Garden State soundtrack
Fiona Apple’s Extraordinary Machine
Patty Griffin’s Impossible Dream
Cat Steven’s Greatest Hits
Four bloggers I am tagging:
Erinn
Jennnn
Melanie
Edie
Wednesday, January 25, 2006
A World of Love
You know, life is funny - a goofy, loopy swirl, seen through the right lens. Ups and downs, losses and gains, but an upward spiral, overall.
I've been away from my blog for a long time. I've missed it. I have so much I wanted to say, but I've been busy, and some of what I'd like to say, I can't. I started sending out my DQs again, yesterday. I got some nice responses from people who would have a right to be annoyed with me for my sporadic communications. I spent time Sunday with one of the dearest friends I've ever had. I got a PM this evening from a man I'll probably never meet (though I hold out hope!), who reads my blog and nudges me back in when I get too far out of the loop. (Thanks, Jay.)
Love is a precious commodity in this world. It's not that it's rare, it's that we so rarely see even a smidgeon of what's there. Now, I must find a Hafiz to quote, as he knows so well what I am feeling.... OK. Done- This one will say it:
It Felt Love
How Did the rose
Ever open its heart
And give to the world
All its
Beauty?
It felt the encouragement of light
Against its
Being.
Otherwise,
We all remain
Too
Frightened.
Translated by Daniel Ladinsky, The Gift
I am so grateful for the abundance of loving, open people in my life.
I've been away from my blog for a long time. I've missed it. I have so much I wanted to say, but I've been busy, and some of what I'd like to say, I can't. I started sending out my DQs again, yesterday. I got some nice responses from people who would have a right to be annoyed with me for my sporadic communications. I spent time Sunday with one of the dearest friends I've ever had. I got a PM this evening from a man I'll probably never meet (though I hold out hope!), who reads my blog and nudges me back in when I get too far out of the loop. (Thanks, Jay.)
Love is a precious commodity in this world. It's not that it's rare, it's that we so rarely see even a smidgeon of what's there. Now, I must find a Hafiz to quote, as he knows so well what I am feeling.... OK. Done- This one will say it:
It Felt Love
How Did the rose
Ever open its heart
And give to the world
All its
Beauty?
It felt the encouragement of light
Against its
Being.
Otherwise,
We all remain
Too
Frightened.
Translated by Daniel Ladinsky, The Gift
I am so grateful for the abundance of loving, open people in my life.
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